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  1. #1
    Tom FlameBolt1's Avatar
    Tom FlameBolt1 is offline Master Gamer
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    Icon11 The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    This story is about three kids John,Mary,and Sam going into a different dimension will the survive and get out of this strange world?

    John ran out of Johnson Barry high school and went to his best friend Sam`s house to go to the mall with him and see a new movie. But when he got there the door was locked and screaming was coming from inside! He broke through their window and saw Sam on the ground along with Mary. Then a strange creature grabbed John. "Let me go!" John yelled at the top of his lungs trying to get out of its grip. He was knocked out by the monster. When he woke up he was in a destroyed city all of the buildings were completely demolished but he also saw something running towards him super fast.... TO BE COUNTINUED! PLZ COMMENT


  2. #2
    RandomPlayer's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    Not bad. A bit more detail could make it more interesting, picturing a mental movie for the more imaginative readers. Very nice so far, though. Good work.
    Status: Quit FR since I never liked FR at all. Will probably not post anymore.

  3. #3
    Tom FlameBolt1's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    Thank you for the advice and compliment


  4. #4
    Tom FlameBolt1's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    part 2 coming soon


  5. #5
    Stephan Salvatore's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    Cool Story...............=]
    "Stephan Salvatore" 'Sta f n Sal va' tore' - noun -<Insider> Vampire Pixie Male since 1864, who was born with necromantic abilities. Also gets buried in holes. He is often misunderstood, and portrayed as a blood-sucking beast. (Even though he isn't.) He may randomly bite you, but do not be scared."

  6. #6
    Caitlin Trueheart's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    Seems like a pretty interesting story. Just add a little more detail Can't wait for part 2!

  7. #7
    Tom FlameBolt1's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    thank you part 2 is called the mystic city keep an eye out for it


  8. #8
    Kelvin64's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    Nice story! very short though...

  9. #9
    Tom FlameBolt1's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Dark World Part 1 The Adventure Begins

    part 2 is out yes it is short but there will be be about thirty parts


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